In the morning, while it was still very dark, Jesus got up and went out to a deserted place, and there he prayed (Mark 1.35).
When I draw apart from the crowd, it may seem to others that I embark on a quest for solitude. However, always it is for me a search for communion, indeed, union. Yes, with God in Whose Image I am made. Yet also with that proverbial “cast of 1000s” – the innate and intricate aspects of my personality (some bright and others, lesser lights) that (all whom) together, make me me.
© 2021 PRA
Illustration: Christ Retreats to the Mountain to Pray, James Tissot (1836-1902)
occasional observations of mind and heart, soul and spirit 
Alone with my crowd is really something to behold I think….Over the years I’ve seen various members of “your crowd” and some of them are more friendly than others, BUT they are all great because they do make you who you are. Whenever I get ready to speak, I always go off to be by myself (after mingling with the crowd) because once I’m introduced I want to be my best self during my presentation and I need a moment or two of solitude so that I can do that!
Love
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Loretta, your experience of solitude before speaking brings to mind those words/phrases that describe, as you write, your “want(ing) to be my best self: “collecting one’s self” and “being in touch with one’s self.” I smile, too, when I think of what I oft say and mean when I say, “Okay, people!” For I seek to engage in dialogue all of my internal aspects of self, especially when I think and feel each of those parts of myself (indeed, my self) is not in cooperation with all of the other parts and, therefore, that I, as a whole, am “out of sorts.”
As for your experience of speaking, a moment or two of solitude is a grand gift to yourself so that you can and will be the grand gift to your audience.
Love
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