When Winning Isn’t Everything

Not a New Year’s resolution, but a still-at-the-beginning-of-the-New-Year reflection


Argue not in unprofitable talk, for such words do no good (Job 15.3)

I’ve never lost an argument. Not in the courtroom of my mind. Where I was the prosecuting attorney making my always airtight case against anyone I blamed (always, I confess, on trumped-up charges) for what I did that I shouldn’t have done and what I didn’t do that I should have done.

I’ve won. Every time. For the defense attorneys (those I accused for my faults) always failed to appear and the judge-and-jury-of-one (me) always favored my cause.

Although every victory was easy, indeed, guaranteed, it also was pyrrhic and false. For I still had to pay the court-appointed costs of guilt and shame; the inescapable consequences of having done what I should not and not having done what I should.

When I learned (finally!) to take responsibility for my failings, I no longer needed to go to court.

Postscript: If I desire (and I pray not) to go to court, I remember the address on that shadowy street, Self-Pity.

© 2022 PRA

2 thoughts on “When Winning Isn’t Everything

  1. Ohhhhh my Paul!!! This was awesome!! We all want to avoid court, but as you pointed out, we definitely have to learn how to accept responsibility for all the things we’ve done or not done as the case may be!! Your blog title is absolutely perfect, because winning definitely isn’t everything!! Sometimes it really is more about how we play the game!

    much love!


    1. Loretta, I’ve been musing over your comment about how we play the game. Hmmm, that feels right to me. For the how of our being and doing can outweigh in significance the what of our being and doing. Still, for me, as I explore and re-explore my court-trials of my mind, I, in the past, didn’t want to avoid court. For there I made my case by, to, and with myself, always against others, and, as I wrote, always won. Now, on balance, in my living, I want to avoid courts, literally and proverbially, at all costs. For the verdicts, although assured, always, as I also wrote, were false. Better to live in and with honesty, which, following your lead, is the best way to play this game we call “life.”

      Love you


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